Monday, March 03, 2008

Motivation: the Columbus carrot

Over at Boiled Sports, Purdue fan BoilerDowd notes that Spartan fans get free tacos when MSU puts up at least 70 in a game. He then goes on and takes a stab at what sort of bribes he'd have to lay out for Penn State or Northwestern to get them to dispatch the Badgers this week, even going so far as to proffer a food item to the Wildcats that puts us into the Brave New World of ethnic stereotypes. That's what separates us from the actual journalists, friends: they don't get to have any fun with their material.

Anyway, I don't think Michigan can beat Purdue and last I checked they had plenty of people paying their basketball players anyway, so let me just make this offer to the Buckeyes: take care of business against the Boilermakers and you too might be enjoying the cool, refreshing taste of Kodiak chewing tobacco. What's your cut? Thick? Long? Are you the type of man who like a bit of mint in there so you feel fresh when yer gettin' yer chaw on?

Do yourselves a favor, OSU: work hard, play tough, and find yourself an empty Mountain Dew bottle. Smokeless tobacco: a little taste of Columbus in every loogie.

ps: Check up on all the non-revenue sports action over at Cardinal and White Chronicles


boilerdowd said...

Damnit! That just might work.

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